A snippet from earlier this week, featuring Coworker Goddess and your favorite Kat:
CWG: This person lives on “Virginia Street” and there’s a typo on their contract – it says “Virgin Street.”
Kat: The problem with living on Virgin Street is it never gets plowed.
I will laugh about this for at least the next three days.
I tell you this story to illustrate not only my rapier wit, but also to serve as a dire warning. If you want to roll with me, this is what your life will be like. You will have to tolerate being my straight man until you finally reach the point where you either run for your life and enter the Witness Protection Program, or slowly back away while distracting me with something shiny (and then run). There are no other options. Even if you die, I will use your corpse to facilitate my punch line.
My phone keeps making this little jingly noise and alerting me – “new tag collected.” What in the hell is a tag, and why am I collecting them?
I have two rather substantial projects going on, and I hope to complete them both by the end of the year, or at least have them self-sustaining by then. After that, guess what? I have another substantial project to tackle. This particular one involves my darling Thor (side note – if you have an entrepreneurial spirit, I highly recommend dating an MBA, they have so many good ideas) and is, well, exciting. Even if it goes absolutely nowhere, I am looking forward to the journey. My deadline is February 14th – his is January 1st. Mine is a little more practical, since I have no intention of really putting forth much effort until February 12th at about 10 pm. Curious? Good. (insert wink here.)
Somebody stole my “Kat’s on Fire” car magnet off the Katmobile. Well, joke’s on you, douchebag, because I was about to take it off anyway; it was all peeling and bleached-out and yucky-looking. Unless, of course, you took it because you are secretly in love with me, in which case I take back the “douchebag” part and wish you a happy day. Plus, I’ll have an even more awesome one this Spring. (See Point 3...ohhhh…the suspense….)
I don’t have a fifth point, but tradition says every sermon should have 5 points, so insert your own clever point here.