Sunday, July 15, 2012

Kat and the City

So, my youngest left today to spend the rest of his summer with his father, 175 miles from mommy.  I've been actively raising children for 23 years; I've never, ever, EVER been alone for 6 weeks.  EVER.  (Well, there was that time my parents left me at the rest stop, but I've blocked most of that out.)

In what may qualify me for the "Worst Mother of the Year" award, I'm actually looking forward to it.  He is, after all, 13; it's not like he's a toddler who will be crying into his pillow every night for me.  I'm single, in a new city, with a new job and a new apartment, and it's summertime.  I will be able to work on my fire program, hopefully get some fire house tours in, and who knows -maybe a ridealong or two.  And then there is, of course, my social life.  No reason to be home at any given time, other than to get myself to work on time the next morning.  I was just gifted a bike by a friend of my dad's - if I want to get off work, grab a bagel, jump on my bike and hit the Centennial Trail until dark (which, by the way, is right next to my place), well, so be it.  No reason not to!  Nobody to make dinner for; nobody to even have to PLAN dinner for.  And the social events!  Just imagine how the invitations will flow in from all my new co-workers!

I met my ex at the "halfway point", which happens to be a grocery store, at 3:00.  I picked the bike up at 4:30.  At 5, I went to the mall to pick up something I had ordered earlier in the week and get a pretzel, cuz that's how us single, kid-free women roll. 

And in the spirit of free-wheeling singleness, I stopped in Victoria's Secret.  Now for those of you who don't recall, I'm about 60 pounds lighter than I was this time last year, and well, I think I'm looking pretty darned sweet.  So off I go to look at stuff that I couldn't have wore last year, checking myself out in every full-length mirror I see.  I hit the fragrance section - VS has great perfumes, don't they - and found one that really grew on me.  I think it was called "Tease" but don't quote me on that.  Anyhow, some girl who probably isn't even legally old enough to work in the state of Washington comes up to me and says, "Can I help you?"

"Oh, I'm just looking at these fragrances.  This one is just delicious."  (I said "delicious" because that's how sexy people talk.)

Too Young To Work looks at the bottle in my hand and says, "Oh, yes.  That's the one MY MOM likes."

MY MOM. 

Leave it to me to ping on "Old Lady Smell" in Victoria's Secret.  Do I even need to mention that no sale was made?

By 5:30, I had left voice messages for most of the people I know, telling them about this scandal at Victoria's Secret.

By 5:45, I had texted everyone else I know, asking them uber-important stuff like "What are you doing?" and "COME VISIT ME PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE."

It's now 7:20, and if it wasn't still daylight outside, I would go to bed.

How many more days until the end of August?



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