Last Sunday night.
Steelers vs. Ravens and Exam #1.
Normally I fall asleep during Sunday night football, but for the next
six Sundays, we have a little project that requires me to stay awake.
Okay, first of all – who, in the name of all that is holy,
came up with those Gawd-awful uniforms for Pittsburgh?
Moving on.
So, exam #1 was 50 questions. My goal is to score a 90% on each of these 6
exams. This means, dearest reader, that
I can only miss 5 on this one. I have to be honest,
it did not start well. The first several
questions were based on a passage that Thor had to read aloud to me, presumably
to test my listening comprehension skills.
Of course, my goal immediately switched from “get a 90%” to “make Thor laugh
to the point he can’t read anymore.” But
I rock so hard, I still got all those questions right.
I moved from section to section pretty quickly. Admittedly, the exams get progressively more
difficult, I’m guessing so that you don’t get immediately discouraged, quit,
and spend the rest of your life disillusioned and bitter with a dead-end career
in banking or something. Anyhow, I got a
94 on this, the easiest, exam. I missed
1 “house diagram” question; 1 “drive the apparatus to the fire scene without
breaking any traffic laws” question; and 1 “in which direction does this gear
turn” question. I only feel badly about
the house diagram one; I just wasn’t paying attention. As for the driving question, since I’m
driving a big, bad-ass fire truck, I should get to drive where I like, and
people should just get the hell out of the way.
And the gear question…well, if that actual operating mechanical device
were right in front of me, those gears would already be turning, and it would
be a moot point.
I’m still holding to my original supposition that, on paper,
I’d be a great firefighter.
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